First Time Father: First Ultrasound

Ok, so we made it to weeks 12/13.  Or more apropos, my wife made it.  And during this week we went to the doctor for her first ultrasound.  You should know that I was very excited going in since I have been reading about the whole pregnancy process step by step, and I learned that this first ultrasound should be able to tell us if our child to be is gestating nicely or not. 

Monday morning we arrived at the doctor’s office and didn’t wait long.  I always enjoy not having to read month’s old issues of magazines.  The ultrasound technician came out almost immediately and escorted us to a room that looks a lot like any ultrasound room you may have seen in movies.  I confess I was getting a bit nervous at this point because in a matter of minutes I would be staring at a screen and seeing my unborn child for the very first time.  Sandi seemed more relaxed than I was, but I could tell she was a bit nervous, too.  The tech didn’t wait long to spurt the jelly on Sandi’s belly, but not before I asked if the stuff was as cold as Hollywood leads us to believe.  She told me she warms it up which made me feel better, but then again, it wasn’t going on my stomach.

I don’t know what the ultrasound device is called that is placed right on the stomach, it may just be called the ultrasound (though I think that is the whole process), but as soon as she made contact with Sandi’s stomach an undeniable image was plastered on the screen for us to see: our child.  The baby actually jumped several times as soon as we saw it, and stretched its legs!  And at one point it even turned around just to let us know it didn’t have one good side, but two. 

I was wide-eyed with excitement, but near speechless until the tech allowed us to hear the baby’s heartbeat for the very first time.  The pulse was 167.  Rapid, but perfectly normal.  Also normal was everything else the tech usually searches for at this stage, which was a relief to me.  I got a bit teary-eyed with joy and grabbed my wife’s hand for a good squeeze.  After Sandi requested some wallet-sized photos I told her I would see myself out so she could get on with the rest of her exam.  I had to go to work, but I I’d have rather been anywhere else than stay in a room while Sandi gets probed with devices that could have been used in the movie Marathon Man.  (If you haven’t seen this movie you are really missing out, especially for one of the most uncomfortable scenes in cinema history.)

So out the door I left but on the way to work I was thinking more about this whole process and thankful that my wife was starting to feel better. The first trimester had been really hard on her.  It isn’t just the nausea, but the bouts of depression she had felt where at times had been so bad that she confessed to not wanting to leave the house until the kid was born.  Sandi is very active and likes to work out, so having the extra weight has played with her mentality as well.  I just encouraged her to do what she can and have advised that this is the time to fight through that depression and try as hard as she can to stick to the routine.  It seems to be working because she has hit a sort of second wind now that we have reached the start of her second trimester. 

I should also mention that at the onset of the pregnancy we decided to get another dog as a companion to our two-year old shepherd/lab mix, Richard Parker.  I figured that RP could use some company in the coming months once we started spending a lot of time in the doctor’s office.  Since we got a new puppy, just eight weeks at the time, I figured dealing with an annoying parasite that yaps, craps, barks, bites, pees, and poops in the house would be a good gauge of the patience we might have as parents of a newborn.  And what I learned was if your wife is newly pregnant you should never ever introduce something else to the picture that messes up her happy place.  Fenway, the puppy, has been as annoying as expected, but I was/am determined to break him in and get him house trained so that we don’t have to worry about any of his shenanigans in the coming months.  RP has been a patient big brother to Fenway, but I wish he would scold the little one when he breaks house rules.  Why am I mentioning this?  I dunno.  Oh, yeah.  I am telling you this because I know Sandi wasn’t thrilled about having a kid to begin with, but like her view of Fenway I have seen a shift in her feelings and expectations and it pleases me that she has started to get excited about being a mother.  Make no mistake; she’ll be a great mother.  She has four nephews and I have seen her with them.  She’s terrific.  But I know that this experience is bringing her many challenges, both physically and mentally and we are working on them together. 

As for me, well I am fine.  I am giddy most of the time and I am still under no illusions that this process will be easy.  I walk the aisles in the supermarket thinking I should buy diapers and food now since the economy is so bad, but I stop myself.  I think of sleep I won’t be getting in the future and get tired of just having those thoughts.  I have been asking my friends with kids question after question, including how their wives dealt with things.  And I had even volunteered to change some diapers last week but the Oscars were on so I had to renege on my offer.  But I’ll definitely change a few diapers to get the hang of it before our baby arrives.

So what’s next?  I think she has an appointment at the end of the month and until then she needs to live the Hulk-a-mania way:  take her vitamins, say her prayers, and do her homework or something like that.  We keep reading baby magazines and do our best to eat right and keep at our exercises.  I am actually losing weight right now because I am trying to get in shape and I know that has to be a bit hard on Sandi.  I think I am supposed to gain sympathy weight, but I already have enough of that so I need to do more exercise for the three of us. 

So that’s it for this installment.  Enjoy the pictures of the ultrasound and the crazy-disturbing fetus model that the tech handed to my wife on the way out yesterday.  Feel free to leave me a comment below.  Any advice would be appreciated.